Art Letters

“Growing up, I never knew a relaxed woman.

Successful women? Yes. Productive women? Plenty. Anxious and afraid and apologetic women? Heaps of them. But relaxed women? At ease, women? Women who aren’t afraid to take up space in the world? Women who prioritize rest and pleasure and play?

Women who give themselves unconditional permission to relax - without guilt, without apology, without feeling like they need to earn it? I’m not sure I’ve ever met a woman like that. But I would like to become one. I would like us all to become one.”

• Nicola Jane Hobbs

Why does ease feel so effortful? In January I made it my word of the year so I wouldn’t forget to work hard at taking it easy. Nicola’s words above give me a painful feeling in my gut. And they also feel like a guidepost. Why the tendency to justify, to only allow for rest, relaxation and ease when deemed earned?

The concept of ease as a goal in and of itself, was first presented to me by Rachel E. Cargle, while listening to her book, A Renaissance of Our Own.

“My highest values are encompassed by the words: ease, abundance, and opportunity. These are the lens through which I move through the world. This is the lens through which I make my decisions.”

What might it look like to pass decisions through an ease filter first?

In experimenting with this filter, I’ve come up internally against what feels less renaissance and more resistance. Guilt, wanting to do the ‘right’ thing, wanting to be liked, and worry of the pending consequences of saying no, have risen to the top. It’s becoming clearer why the pursuit of ease feels so pursuit-full.

I think effort has its place alongside ease though, at least for now. To retrain old thoughts, to rewire pathways, to reconnect to intuition and the body’s innate feedback, requires active effort.

To evolve into a woman who is relaxed. A woman who takes up space in the world. A woman who prioritizes rest and pleasure and play. A woman at ease.

May we know them, may we be them, may we raise them.

FEMININOMENON
48 x 48 Acrylic and Resin on Custom Wood Panel
mioneplant.com

Thank you for personally connecting with me through this work. Ease looks good on you.